QUESTIONS & DISCOVERY
The best conversations don't start with answers. They start with good questions.
Your job isn't to work your way through a checklist of questions.
Your job is to understand the family sitting in front of you.
Ask a question. Listen to the answer. Then let what they tell you help determine where the conversation goes next.
Sometimes the most important thing a family tells you isn't the answer to the question you asked. It's something they say while answering it.
That's why listening matters more than getting through every question.
WHAT I WANT YOU TO REMEMBER
Don't interview the family.
Don't interrogate them.
And don't ask questions just so you can get to the part where you start talking.
Be curious.
When someone tells you something that sounds important, stay there for a moment.
You might simply ask:
“Tell me a little more about that.”
or:
“Why is that important to you?”
Then listen.
You don't always need another clever question. Sometimes you just need to give someone enough room to keep talking.
PRIMARY RESOURCE FOR YOU
CML-SC-102 | Questions & Discovery Field Guide™ | V1.2
This is your primary field guide for discovery conversations. It helps you ask thoughtful questions, understand what matters to the family, explore what they already have in place, uncover concerns and priorities, and let the conversation develop naturally without pressure or assumptions.
WHEN THE CONVERSATION UNCOVERS SOMETHING
Sometimes a good discovery conversation reveals something the family hasn't thought about yet. These tools can help them continue thinking after the conversation.
Who Should I Choose? Estate Planning Decision-Maker Guide™ | Public V1.2
A practical client guide that helps families think through who should serve in important estate planning roles, including trustee, financial and healthcare decision-maker, executor, and guardian, by focusing first on the qualities each role requires.
Estate Planning Life Changes Checklist™ | Public V1.2 Fillable
A practical fillable checklist that helps families identify important life, family, financial, property, and relationship changes that may make it worthwhile to review whether their estate plan still reflects their wishes.
HOW I WOULD SAY IT
If a family gives you a short answer, don't immediately jump to your next question.
For example, they might say:
“We already have a trust.”
Instead of thinking, Well, there's nothing for me to do here, get curious.
You might say:
“I understand. When was the last time you looked at it to see whether it still reflects what you want?”
Or someone might say:
“Our kids know what we want.”
You might respond:
“Tell me a little more about that. What have you already talked with them about?”
You're not trying to lead them toward an answer.
You're trying to understand.
PUT IT INTO PRACTICE
Before your next Family Legacy Review™, choose three discovery questions from the field guide that feel natural to you.
Don't memorize twenty questions.
Start with three.
Ask the first question and really listen to the answer before deciding what to ask next.
After the meeting, ask yourself:
What did they tell me that mattered most?
Did I really listen, or was I thinking about what I wanted to say next?
What did I learn that I wouldn't have known if I hadn't asked?
That's how you get better at discovery.
USE CURRENT APPROVED MATERIALS
Always use the current version available in the Legacy Specialist Resources™ center rather than previously saved or downloaded versions.